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The spam subject line that serves as a title for this post is one of those things that’s somehow both a bit creepy and a bit amusing to me, but that I’m pretty sure will be neither for others.

That’s not the case with this week’s Auspicious Spam Award winner: “Solemn Naginata-do Trick Shot.” This one made me think of my old friend Conrad, somehow, but also filled me with a kind of regret. “Man,” I thought, “it’s too bad they’re just pimping erectile dysfunction drugs, because I really, really would like to learn a solemn naginata-do trick shot or two. That would solve all of my problems, I’m pretty sure.”

Some of my favorite recent Dadaist spam subject lines:

• get it straight cortex demon
• something is fool
• a run is majorette cryptogram

A fine recent spam return-address:

• blackseamonkeyprincess@hotmail.com

Why even pay attention to the noxious fumes of unwanted byte-sized memes spewing over my e-transom? Spamomancy, that’s why.

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